


Yearning

by LostAtSeaz



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Post-Chimera Ant Arc, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sleepy Cuddles, They talk and apologize to each other, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, but it’s not that bad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:40:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28148502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostAtSeaz/pseuds/LostAtSeaz
Summary: And sometimes, he thought about ocean blue eyes, white eyelashes and a smug grin.Gon didn't realize how much Killua had gone through just for him to find his father until he'd gotten home. He sacrificed his hands for them to win some stupid dodgeball game, he went home to save Alluka and heal him. And worst of all he’d seen Gon's limp, barely alive body next to Pitous remains.And somehow even after all of the things Gon had done to him, he still forgave him. Gon found it hard to believe that.-Killua goes to Whale Island to visit Gon, and they make up.
Relationships: Gon Freecs & Mito Freecs, Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Mito Freecs & Alluka Zoldyck, Mito Freecs & Killua Zoldyck
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	Yearning

**Author's Note:**

> 3 Shot, next chapter coming soon. :)

Past Gon didn’t think that anything like this would’ve happened. He thought he’d stay with Killua forever and adventure the world just as they’d said. It was a  _ childish _ wish. Both Killua and Gon would've needed to move on and go on their own paths. It was inevitable, and it hurt.

Days on Whale Island had become dull and repetitive. Nothing seemed to excite him as much as before. So, he spent most of his time at the beach and at home.

Gon had many sleepless nights while staying on Whale Island.

He occasionally felt sour towards people for no reason at all. Take Kite for example, Gon sometimes cursed Kite in his head for not telling him about his nen earlier, he wouldn't have had to hurt anyone, he wouldn't have had to stain his hands with Pitous blood. But, he knew he couldn't blame Kite for any of this; he felt guilty for blaming him for it.

  
  
  


And sometimes, he thought about ocean blue eyes, white eyelashes and a smug grin.

Gon didn't realize how much Killua had gone through just for him to find his father until he'd gotten home. He sacrificed his hands for them to win some stupid dodgeball game, he went home to save Alluka and heal  _ him _ . And worst of all he’d seen Gon's limp, barely alive body next to Pitous remains. 

And somehow even after all of the things Gon had done to him, he still forgave him. Gon found it hard to believe that. 

He still hadn't given him an actual apology. 

He's thought many times about texting him one, but he realized that apologizing in person would be better. And then again, he thought that he shouldn't bring it up because he felt as if he might ruin the moment for Killua and Alluka.

The day they went to the world tree was optimistic and positive, they didn't really have any problems and everything felt like the old days, before they battled the Chimera Ants. But when he had gone up the tree the whole mood changed for him, he wondered whether or not he should've gone all this way for one man who was going to leave him again anyways.

  
  
  
  


When he'd gotten home he was greeted with a crying, furious Mito.  _ ”You idiot! Why! Why did you do something so reckless!” _ Mito had said while bawling into his shirt, soaking it with salty wet tears. Gon didn't know what to do or what to say, so instead of answering he just stayed silent.

He’d eased back into the rhythm of life almost instantly. And he had given up on trying to get his nen to return, he felt like getting it back would be a curse rather than a blessing.

He was convinced Mito had figured out that something was off about him. She often gave him worried glances when he spaced out. He needed to tell her about this soon, it just wasn't  _ right _ to hide it. 

  
  
  
  


**_September 21st, Monday_ **

_ (Today I felt like going into a coma and never waking up again, Aunt Mito saw me washing my hands. I’m scared.) _

  
  


He had been cutting vegetables with Mito. The day was going fine for the both of them so far.

“Gon, I can do the rest, you just go wash your hands. Alright?” Mito had told him while tending to the rest of the vegetables. He didn’t argue.

Gon put down the knife onto the cutting board and made his way to the bathroom sink, since the other one was being used.

He squirted some of the blue hand soap onto his hands, turned on the sink, and washed his hands.

But, the soap wouldn't go away, it just smeared. So, Gon scrubbed harder.  _ and harder. and harder. _

”I want it off.. I don't like blood..”

“I don’t want Mito to see me like this..” 

“What would she think of me..”

“I don’t want her to see me, just wash off  _ please _ .”

He continued, scrubbing until his skin was red, torn and damaged.

“ _ Wash off, wash off, wash off _ , wash  **_off_ ** !”

Mito peaked her head into the bathroom.

“Gon? What’s going on?” Mito gasped and thrusted herself in between Gon and the sink, “What…  _ What _ are you doing?” She took both of Gons bleeding hands into her own and took a look at the freshly made cuts. Gon couldn’t look her in the eye.

“Gon, what happened? Why are you doing this?”

When Gon looked up, he saw the pure terror in Mitos eyes and it frightened him to the core.

Then, he looked down.

His hands were irritated, they stung and the blood drizzled down his arms.

But the one thing that came to mind when Gon looked down was that his hands weren’t covered in blue, they were covered in  _ red _ .

**Author's Note:**

> I am sorry for spamming angst, forgive me and take this.


End file.
